Alternatives to Anger

As a middle school teacher (or any adult that consistently works with teenagers) you realize that they know how to push your buttons. My first reaction is to pull out my angry eyes and try to intimidate them with my "authority." Often, this works well enough, other times, they throw it back in my face with a mocking smile or laugh. In addition, I typically feel a sour taste in my mouth or a twist in my stomach as I revisit those encounters afterwards.

When I have been in the good presence of mind, I have found that these methods work better:

• Crazy but possible alternatives (Fine--if you don't want to finish the test, I'll just call your mother and she can come in to sit with you while you take this test.)
• Blank stare, often with a finger pointing to what they need to be doing (The key to this working is saying NOTHING and patience--show that you can outwait them. However, the waiting can't last too long, or else the stare is rendered ineffective. You need to employ another tactic at this point.)
• Laugh & joke (Hah--take a test? Posh, why would you need to do that? <smile> Now get over there and get on with it!)
• Use pressure of peers (Everyone's waiting on you...can we get started, please?)

Sorry, parents, invoking the "I'll call your parents" doesn't work as well for you. Perhaps the "We'll see what your dad/mom have to say about that" works okay.

These are some of my suggestions. What do you do to manage button-pushing teenagers?